Paula Deen made a reappearance on the Today show this morning at the very same studios where she was filmed breaking down in tears more than a year when discussing the racism allegations against her at the time. But with the charges now dismissed, the TV chef has put the controversy behind her, although she does acknowledges that she "hurt people" with her use of the n-word.
The 67-year-old southern food buff found herself in the middle of a sexual harassment and racial discrimination lawsuit from a former employee, but the scandal really exploded when Paula sat down for her deposition and admitted under oath that she had used the n-word in the past. An incredibly emotional and uncomfortable interview with the Today show soon followed and saw Paula break down in tears on live TV, and she says the interview should have never happened.
"I looked at none of it, Matt, because I didn't recognize that woman. That was a woman in trauma, in, I would say shock, trying to understand what had happened. The cold, hard fact, Matt, is I probably should not have been here. I probably should have been at home, maybe even under the care of a doctor," Paula told Matt Lauer this morning.
As a result of the controversy, Paula was dropped from the Food Network and lost endorsements from a number of huge companies including QVC, Target and Walmart, telling: "I did, but I have to say, it took me a while because I was confused as to the length of time since those words had been part of a language. I had a hard time understanding because it had been 30 years. I had to go home, sit on my sofa and get off the merry-go-round. I had to remove myself and sit quietly so I that I could think and see things from all angles."
Explaining how the incident has changed her, Paula, who was joined by her two sons for the interview, told the anchor: "I've always been very, very naïve, Matt. Unless you do something that can see that you're trying to hurt me, in my heart, you're good. That's childlike and it's naïve. I'm trying to be more guarded. I don't ever want to get to the point where I'm cynical, because I believe that there are more good people than bad."
Paula Deen was joined by her sons for her comeback on the Today show this morning (Today Show/Twitter)
Apologising for her offensive comments, Paula said: "I really feel like it's going to require another book. We are working on a documentary because I feel like everybody needs to know the entire story. We're doing a documentary that will be on the Paula Deen Network. But, as I was saying, I learned so much when I sat quietly with my own thoughts. The most powerful thing - and I thought I knew it, because I've talked about it before - is the power of words. I don't care how old they are. Words are so powerful. They can hurt.
"They can make people happy. Well, my words hurt people. They disappointed people. And frankly, I disappointed myself. And for that, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for the hurt that I've caused people. Because it went deep. It went deep. People lost their jobs. It went deep into corporate America. I'm here to make people happy, not to bring sadness."
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